Even with so many Ibrox fan media outlets including dozens of podcasts Super Scoreboard on Radio Clyde on Friday contained more madness than you could reasonably expect in one hour of broadcasting.
Fittingly Hugh Keevins was the pundit reacting to the incredible claims of Ibrox fans following a press release to selected messengers to share the good news that their suffering had suddenly came to an end.
Keevins has cheered on every Revolution and change of management, in 2016 he was telling listeners how Mark Warburton would leave Brendan Rodgers trophy-less with every manager since then acclaimed as a genius with a total of three trophies collected in more than a decade.
Micky Beale was the Brains Behind Gerrard, less than a year later Phil Clement was the new and improved Ange Postecoglou as the veteran reported prayed for a return to the good old days of financial doping that produced the O** F*** where trophies tended to be shared out between the two Glasgow clubs.
Although not on Dave Murray’s A-list Keevins could call on direct access when the demand was coming from his bosses to produce a back page or inside splash.
While James Traynor, Graham Spiers and other favourites dined in succulent lamb during a lads weekend in Jersey to celebrate Murray’s 10th anniversary as owner and Chairman, in 1998 Keevins was presented with a stunning quote.
For every fiver Celtic spend I will spend a tenner was the message from Murray to the excitable reporter.
It could have been the quote to warn Rangers fans about the waste at their club where following the appointment of Dick Advocaat seriously silly money had been paid for Gabriel Amato, Daniel Prodan, Alexi Kanchelskis, Giovanni van Bronckhurst, Colin Hendry and Arthur Numan. Followed by Michael Ball, two £6m left-backs signed within months!
The previous summer Murray’s shopping had taken him to Italy to bring back Sergio Porrini, his squash partner Marco Negri, Lorenzo Amoruso and Jonas Thern with Stale Stensaas signed from Rosenborg.
Rather than question how Rangers could afford that level of spending Keevins treasured his ‘fiver for a tenner’ quote, glorying in the brilliance of Murray who did seem to have wealth off the radar.
Alas HMRC started to show interest in the decade that followed, Murray got more desperate, eventually he was duped into grabbing a pound coin rolled his way by a scruffy wee guy from Motherwell.
Since HMRC came calling life has been less than wonderful for Keevins, The new reality isn’t a comfortable place to be associated with. The trophy count over the last decade has been an uncomfortable 22 v 3. Somehow ‘for every trophy won we will win more than seven’ doesn’t have the same feel to it.
Friday’s phone in, five hours after the historic press release was the equivalent of the Chimps Tea Party as caller after caller rang in to drool over pyoor mullyins and mullyins heading into Ibrox topped of by screaming that ‘WE’RE BACK’.
Again? The cynic or realist might add.
There was virtually nothing of detail in Friday’s press release as the messengers were told that £20m plus was to be sent on players.
No questions were asked about why there was no media conference, no RTV interviews with the new owners. No price given for the sale of the shares, the names of the sellers wasn’t revealed but they have achieved the magic number of 51%, somehow.
Three days on there is nothing on Companies House about the sale of shares or the three newly appointed Directors or the three kicked off the board as the Revolution kicked off.
49ers Enterprises is being used at every opportunity, they have one of the five new Directors, mystery man Andrew Cavenagh is apparently the new Chairman even though Companies House is in the dark about it. Fear not according to the Daily Record. he is either a pharmaceutical tycoon or a billionaire. Naturally there is no evidence presented for either claim.
Friday’s euphoria hasn’t been followed up by much in the way of transfer moonbeams, Luka Modric has given way to Jamie Vardy who won’t be uprooting his wife and family from the midlands.
Training starts in three weeks time with Lyall Cameron replacing Vaclav Cerny, Tom Lawrence, Ianis Hagi and Leon Balogun who have all moved on, taking their wages elsewhere.
Super Scoreboard should be comedy gold over the next few weeks, although reduced to one hour Friday demonstrated just how deluded the Gullible truly are to their American dream.
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